BOOK 8 ŠRESTRUCTURING
REALITY
(THE HISTORY OF
THE FUTURE - MAX)
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~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ PART 10 ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ (Episode Š The End of the World) (Monday, October 23rd, 2000) Max felt a solid surface beneath his feet and quickly looked
around. He was on Liz's balcony,
just as they had planned and he felt a rush of satisfaction go through
him. If he could do this, change
history, maybe he could save the world, save all of them, but then the
sickening pain of the loss of his connection with Liz hit him. He almost fell to his knees and reached
out to steady himself on the sill. Liz, as a young woman he remembered so well, was in her room
standing before her mirror, juggling the items that had been disturbed by his
arrival. He smiled humorlessly
remembering what his Liz had told him of the events of that evening. She had irrevocably decided they could
not be together, but he had changed her mind so easily a few days later. And now he was here to permanently rend
them apart. As the Liz before him turned toward him, his eyes ran eagerly over
her beautiful face. She had been
his whole world for so long that Max could not envision a life without Liz in
it. She was the person who he
loved above everything, for whom he would sacrifice all, but they were forced
to be eternally apart. He was not
able to keep the anguish out of the single word he spoke. "Liz." ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Song Playing: Girl by Chicago When Max left Liz's house he had stolen a car and driven directly
to the pod chamber to spend the night.
It was the one place he was unlikely to meet anyone. As he had driven through Roswell, he
could still see the ruined city it had become and promised himself he wouldnÕt
allow it to happen again. Max climbed the path to the
pod chamber door and passed his hand over the locking device. The door slid open and he walked inside
to look into the Granolith chamber.
It was the last place he had seen his Liz and he felt drawn to it. He entered the chamber and walked to
where Liz had stood as the Granolith had propelled him back in time and reached
up to touch the place where they had almost touched, but not. As his hand made contact with the smooth, cool surface of the
Granolith, the connection that Max shared with Liz suddenly blazed back into
life and he grabbed for the wall to steady himself as the emotions poured over
him. He saw all of the precious times they had shared together flash
past his eyes, and felt Liz's emotions wrapped up in them. And the one image that was the
strongest, the most precious to Liz, was their wedding day. The images swirled around him, growing
stronger and more vivid. It was as
if he were there again, but this time he was seeing it through Liz's eyes and felt
the overwhelming joy she had experienced that day. He held the image in his mind like it was a tangible thing
and basked in the love, Liz's love for him, which accompanied the images. Then another image wiped away all of the others. It was an image Max didnÕt recognize,
and was not part of, and he knew it had happened after he had left her. Liz stood proudly with Kyle and Maria
before Nicholas and several skin soldiers, and Max desperately grasped for the
image to discover LizÕs fate. But
the blinding flash of an explosion followed by darkness was all that he
saw. Liz was dead. Max knew it with a certainty the left
his soul cold. Liz, the love of
his life, his best friend and soul mate, had died and it was all his
fault. Even his last desperate
action of coming back in time had not saved her. Liz had sent her thoughts, her love, to him as the last act of her
life. She had wanted to tell him
they had succeeded in their mission.
Maria, Kyle and herself had destroyed the Granolith after he had left
and she had sent all of her love and devotion spiraling into their connection,
hoping against hope that he would receive it. He could feel her doubt that he would get her message but
she had sent it anyway, believing their bond would somehow transcend time and
space. But he could also feel the
anguish she had experienced when their connection had been severed and how she
had wished for, even welcomed death and the oblivion that would put an end to
her suffering. The emotions were too overwhelming and Max fell to the floor
sobbing, devastated he had not been by his wife's side when she had died. He had failed her completely. He welcomed the grief that threatened
to engulf him as the memories of their life together assailed him. Liz's happy, laughing face hung before
him like a haunting reminder of what knowing him, being with him, had done to
her. He had ruined Liz's
life. He had killed her. And then his thoughts turned to the innocent girl sleeping just a
few miles away. She was his main
concern now. This Liz had never
seen war or witnessed the murder of friends and family. She'd never had to make life or death
decisions. She'd never been forced
to kill, and he vowed that she never would. He had failed Liz once, but he could make sure that he didnÕt fail
her again. He would make sure this
Liz would never suffer and die at the hands of aliens. She would not die hopeless and wishing
for an end to her life. He would
make Liz see the importance of staying away from her Max, and he would convince
her to do whatever she had to do to make the younger version of himself release
her. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ (Episode Š The End of the World) (Tuesday, October 24th, 2000) Song Playing: Everything I Do, I Do It For You by Bryan Adams Max waited on Liz's balcony while she went to confront his younger
self. After the fiasco with Tess outside the Crashdown, he had redoubled
his efforts to convince Liz to sever all ties between herself and her Max. Liz had fought him, but he had
convinced her to continue, and now she was going to face his younger self
directly. Max walked around the small space, smiling sadly, touching the
items that held so many memories.
The good times and the bad alike were precious to him and he allowed
himself to mourn all he had lost, and all his younger self would never have. And as he moved toward the spot where he and Liz had shared their
first kiss, he felt a strange sensation as new memories started to crowd his
old ones. In his mind, he saw Liz
come to his room. He felt his
younger selfÕs joy and hope at her presence, then confusion as she would not
allow him to speak, and finally despair as she stood before him and told him
all of the things he had been most afraid of. She said that his alien nature had endangered her and was
causing her to push him away. Through the eyes of his younger self, Max watched Liz leave his
room and felt an anguish rise up within him that echoed what his younger self
was feeling. And even though he
knew Liz's words to be lies, the pain was fresh and sharp. He longed to offer comfort to his
younger self, but even if it were possible, he wouldn't. He had to do everything in his power to
make sure that Liz would not die fighting a losing war without him, and if it
meant that his younger self had to suffer without her, then it was a small
price to pay. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Liz returned and Max sat watching her cry. He was hopeful that she had succeeded
in pushing his younger self away but the pain of losing his Liz, added to the
pain of witnessing the Liz before him mourning, was almost more than he could
bear. He reached for a tissue
hoping to comfort her in any small way but his hand passed through the box. Even with grief overwhelming her, Liz noticed immediately. "What, what's happening?" she
asked, the fear evident in her voice. "This must be it," Max said with relief. "What you did must have
worked. I'm leaving." "What, so you're just, you're going back to where you came
from?" Max smiled sadly, realizing for the first time that his passing
would cause her even more pain. He
was the one lifeline she had in the hopeless future she perceived without him,
and when he was gone, she would be utterly alone with their secret. He ached that he had to cause her pain
but he was satisfied it was worth it to save her from suffering and death. "There's nowhere to go back to," Max said softly, as he
eagerly reached for the void that beckoned to him. He thought for a moment he could almost see his Liz waiting
for him, welcoming him, but then his memories started to shift and he was
brought solidly back to Earth. His younger self had gone to Maria and she was telling him to stop
pursuing Liz, to leave her alone.
But as his younger self considered releasing Liz, he remembered her
earlier actions when she had set him up with Tess, and the light of hope was
rekindled within him. MaxÕs
younger self wondered if Liz was pushing him away because she felt it was the
right thing to do. And as Maria's
voice intruded on his thoughts, he knew with absolute certainty that he would
not give her up. He shrugged and
looked up at Maria, "I can't help it. I love her.
What can I say?" Max admired his younger self for his stubborn refusal to give
up. Perhaps if he had possessed
that same driving relentlessness, they wouldn't be where they were now. Then he cursed his younger self for
that same stubbornness. They had
been so close to succeeding and he had been robbed of his chance to rejoin his
Liz. "It didn't work,"
Max said, slamming his now solid hand down. "We have to do something else." But the Liz before him was fighting him too. "No. I, I can't." "You have to," he replied more harshly than he meant to. Liz looked him in the eyes.
"Do you know how hard it was for me to tell him that I didn't want
to die for him? He's the only
reason that I'm alive right now.
You, you've, you got to come up with another plan. Please go to someone else. I, I just, I can't do this
anymore." Max could hear the anguish in her voice
and he longed to comfort her, but everything he was doing was to save her, and
he hardened his heart. He had to
convince her to continue but he knew that she wouldnÕt accept her own salvation
as a reason to act. He would do
anything to save her; lie, cheat, steal or kill. He felt a brief moment of guilt but he quickly pushed it
aside as the solution came to him.
He only had this one last chance to give her a normal life so he
unashamedly based his argument on the others he knew she would risk all to
save. "Just twenty-five minutes before I came here, I held Michael
in my arms, dead." He saw her
jerk to attention, knew that his tactic was working, and continued relentlessly. "Isabel died two weeks before
that." Max could see the resolution start to settle into her features and
he knew he had already won her over.
"Now you have to do this.
You have to find a way."
You have to find a way Liz, he said silently to himself, your life
depends on it. He continued
aloud, "All of our lives
depend on it." ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ (Episode Š The End of the World) (Wednesday, October 25th, 2000) (The Parker House Š LizÕs Bathroom) Song Playing: This Woman's Work by Kate Bush Max sat on the edge of the bathtub, remembering the events of the
coming Friday night, the night of the Gomez concert so many years ago, events
that would now never happen. His
Liz had been softening toward him and he had been hopeful that he could
persuade her to give them another chance.
But when he had arrived outside her window and discovered her distressed
state, his only thought had been to comfort her. That was the night that they had made love for the first
time and it was start of the rest of their lives together. Max was brought back to the present as his younger self approached
Liz's window, just like he had done so many years before, concert tickets in
hand. That night he had come to
ask Liz to the concert again. He
had found her alone, studying, and she had refused to come out to talk to him,
needing the protection of the window frame between. It had made MaxÕs heart soar that she was so afraid of her
own behavior around him, and though they hadnÕt even touched, he had pressed
his advantage. He had professed
his love and told her they were meant to be together, countering every one of
her arguments. And even though she
had eventually asked him to leave, he had never doubted that she was close to
surrender. But suddenly his memories shifted as his younger self looked into
Liz's dark room and heard talking from inside. At first, the younger Max couldnÕt comprehend what he was seeing,
but as he took in the scene before him, understanding slashed through him like
a knife. Liz was in bed with Kyle. His life, his love, had betrayed him
with another man. Even knowing the truth, Max shared the anguish his younger self
was feeling, the fresh agony searing his soul. It rivaled the sense of loss he had felt when his connection
with Liz had been severed and his head bowed under the weight of the pain. He struggled to block out the pain of
his younger self, as the younger Max stumbled across the roof and fumbled
blindly down the ladder. Max
concentrated on the life he had shared with his Liz, the happy times they had
lived before the invasion. He let
Liz's love for him carry away the pain and he pushed the new memories aside. After a few moments Max could hear movement in Liz's room and he
knew she was getting rid of Kyle.
He waited until she silently opened the door to the bathroom to let him
out, and then he followed her through the window and onto the balcony. Liz collapsed onto the chair as if her
strength had abandoned her. Max
sat next to her and noticed she wasnÕt crying and suspected the last couple of
days had been so painful that she had no tears left. Even though he had seen proof on many occasions, Max was still
surprised by Liz's strength.
"I've fought a thousand battles, but watching you do that was the
hardest thing I've ever had to do." "The look on his face.
On your face," Liz said miserably. He had consigned her to a life without her soul mate and she was
only concerned Max's feelings.
Typical Liz, he thought.
"Maybe it's for the best.
For you, too," he rushed to reassure her. Liz was dumbfounded, "What are you talking about? Max had selfishly wished she would remain alone after he was gone,
but he now that the moment was upon him, he had to make sure Liz had a chance
at happiness. He smiled joylessly,
the words he was about to speak ripping him apart inside. "I saw you with Kyle. He's turning out to be a, a great
guy." He had said it earlier and he had thought it impossible, but he
was jealous of Kyle. Jealous of
the friendship that Kyle would share with Liz and jealous of the connection
that would bind them together, and perhaps convince them to be together. He practically choked as he continued,
imagining another man touching her.
"Maybe it would be better for you to be with a human." Liz was always amazed that a handsome, intelligent man like Max
could doubt himself so much. He
didn't realize even now, after they had spent so many years together, that he
had changed her forever.
"Don't you realize what you are to me?" Liz asked him. "What you're always going to
be? You're the love of my life. Everyone else is going to be second
best. There'll never be another
you." Max's heart swelled with love at her words. He had known she loved him but he was
surprised at the depth of her feelings, even after she and his younger self had
been apart for all of those months. "So Max and, Tess are going to be together now," Liz
made it more of a statement than a question. Max wanted to reassure her their love would never end, that he
would never even consider being with Tess, but he couldn't risk giving her that
kind of hope. "I don't know,Ó
he said softly. ŅI don't know
anything now. This is a different
world." "I'm going to be alone," Liz said simply. The thought of Liz pining for him for the rest of her life, filled
him with dread. She was a kind and
loving person with her whole life ahead of her. He had ruined her life and her happiness in his reality and
he wanted to do something to guarantee her happiness this time around. "Maybe. Maybe not."
He continued the thought silently to himself; maybe in the future it
would be possible for them to be together. Maybe. He
continued aloud, "From now on, the future is to be determined. It's what I've always said to you,
Liz. We create our own
destiny." Liz knew this was her last chance to be with Max, and she couldn't
pass it up. "Could you dance
with me?" It was the last thing he had expected her to say and he wasn't
sure he had heard her correctly.
"What?" "I want to have my wedding dance." Liz had always loved to dance and Max was sorry he hadn't thought
of it. As he took Liz into his
arms one last time, the bittersweet strains of their song started to echo through his head. Come to me now And lay your hands over me Max smiled, remembering the first time they had danced to the song,
on their wedding night. The memory
was so strong, that for a moment he was back there, lazily spinning around the
dingy floor with his new bride. Even if it's a lie Say it will be all right And I shall believe As they danced, a new set of memories intruded into MaxÕs
mind. His younger self had gone to
the park and Tess had found him there.
And when he had looked into her eyes, really looked, what he saw was not
what he had expected. In her eyes
he saw loneliness and fear of rejection.
For the first time Max considered how alone Tess must have been,
how much she had felt like an outsider, and he was filled with shame that he
had pushed her away. I'm broken in two And I know you're on to me That I only come home When I'm so all alone But I do believe As Max twirled Liz around, he felt a shift in the universe that
echoed through his soul like the resolution of a chord. His younger self had not stopped loving
Liz and he now knew that he never would, even after the ultimate act of betrayal. But his pain had allowed him to open
his heart, to realize that loving Liz did not stop him from caring for others,
especially his family. He would
never love Tess as she wanted, but he could offer her friendship, support and a
place in the family. And when Tess placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, Max knew
his younger self had made the decision to make Tess more a part of their group. That not everything is gonna be the
way You think it ought to be It seems like every time I try to make
it right It all comes down on me His own knowledge merging with the discovery of his younger self
suddenly made everything become so clear.
After all these years, Max realized that he had been a fool, because
what Tess had really craved all along, he had been lucky to find with Michael
and Isabel, with the Evans, with Liz.
What he had selfishly denied Tess, was a family. Please say honestly you won't give up
on me And I shall believe And I shall believe He had treated Tess badly not because he had been afraid of
growing close to her, but because he hadnÕt wanted to face up to what she had
represented in his past life. And
he had allowed her to leave because she had been a constant reminder of his
responsibilities. Without her
there it had been easier for him to forget he wasn't human, forget about a
planet he didn't want to remember, and a people he didn't know. Out of sight out of mind. Open the door And show me your face tonight I know it's true No one heals me like you And you hold the key He had mistakenly thought if he accepted the Kingship, he would
have to abandon Liz, but he could see now that it was not a question of either
or, it was a balancing act. He had
been a fool not to see it before.
He could be the King of Antar and still have Liz in his life, at his
side. Never again would I turn away from you I'm so heavy tonight But your love is all right And I do believe He had tried to deny his duty to his people and live a normal
human life with Liz but his duties had continually resurfaced. And now that the end was near, he was
faced with the truth. He wasn't a
normal human. He was the King of
Antar. There was no escaping that
destiny and if he had accepted it sooner, embraced everything that it meant,
none of this would have happened. He had denied what he was for too long. Khivar's invasion of Earth had forced him to accept his
position, but by then it had been too late. He wasnÕt prepared, he didnÕt know how to lead his people
and they had lost. If he had
accepted his duty sooner, he could have prepared, made alliances, developed
their powers. He and Liz could
have been together for the rest of their long lives, battling Khivar, raising a
family, or whatever else their lives would have included, instead of dying alone,
years apart in different realities. That not everything is gonna be the
way You think it ought to be It seems like every time I try to make
it right It all comes down on me Max ached to tell Liz of his discovery; she and the younger Max could be together. It wasn't their love that had pushed Tess away. It had been his exclusion of Tess from
their family, their group, his need to deny what and who he was. He eagerly reached for Liz as she
twirled away from him, but his hand passed through hers. Max looked at it dumbly as he watched
the yawning void rush up to meet him.
Please say honestly You won't give up on me And I shall believe "Liz," he cried out urgently, but she didnÕt hear him,
didnÕt look in his direction. He
had failed her again but this time there would be no going back to fix it. Max watched her spinning away from him and considered himself
lucky that she was the last thing he would ever see. "I love you Liz," he whispered, but his voice was
lost even to his own ears, as he dissolved into the blackness. And I shall believe I shall believe ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ END OF BOOK 8 - RESTRUCTURING REALITY (THE HISTORY OF THE
FUTURE - MAX) ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ TBC In BOOK 9 |
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The End of Book 8
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BOOK 8 - RESTRUCTURING REALITY Book 8 Main Book 8 Timeline BOOK 9 - VERISIMILITUDE | |||||
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